Merry Christmas


I am The Wizard of Video Games, and this is coffee and Carmageddon 2


Holy 8-bit Night + = more dope Christmas songs

(Edit 12/30/09: Thanks to the Chinese slamming the hell out of my server, the previews and downloads of the MP3s aren’t available at the moment (including my Halloween Mega-mix!). Merry Christmas to you too, fuckers!)

Once again, the season of holiday is upon us. All up in dat Mass. In my never-ending quest to bring you the best in Catholic-related chiptunes, I’ve come across a gem that was actually released last year during the time of the turkey. Holy 8bit Night + is the work of 16 different chip artists, combining their powers in celebration of the baby Jesus. It’s only been released on the Japanese versions of Itunes and Amazon, but as soon as I can figure out what to click on, the purchase will be as sure and clean as new fallen snow. You can preview most of the tracks at the VORC Records home page, and find the links to the aforementioned eastern versions of said stores. There are also a YouTubes of artist Saitone performing his remix of Sleigh Ride at a show in Tokyo:

Merry the Christmas!


Chiptune stalwarts 8-bit Weapon have “whipped up a tasty batch of delicious holiday chiptunes for everyone!” I’ll be honest and say that I’m not as big a fan of the Weapon, but they’ve got their Mistletoe in the right place. Only one song is available for preview, the somewhat boring, yet cheerful, Deck the Halls. Amen.


If you missed it the first time, be sure to check out Dr. Octoroc’s 8-bit Jesus from last year and sing we joyous, all together.


My new best friend, allistonmedia, has tooken upon themself to convert some of our favorite yuletide SIDs from the High Voltage SID Collection and packaged them up in a nice little package with a bow on top and a .RAR extension on the end. In what could only be called a Christmas Miracle, a mysterious stranger known only as Recorded Amiga Games has created a YouTube preview of the tracks therein:

Who says angels don’t exist?


Finally, if you are a bit (HAHAHA) behind on your X-mas chiptunes, you’ll probably also want to take a look at the elder statesmen (and women) of chiptune, the 8bit Peoples’s release The 8bits of Christmas. Phew! Time for some eggnog.


I’m sorry, but I just keep finding awesome, everywhere. This time, 8bitcollective artist henryhomesweet found some magic in that old Gameboy he found, for when he placed it in his hands, I began to dance around:

[audio:A Frosty Nightmare Before Christmas.mp3]


This one is from the fantastic game Garden Gnome Carnage, a sort of reverse Lemmings type of affair with parachuting elves, black cats, and air strikes:


8-bit Jesus = absolutely sick Christmas music

UPDATE: Doc’s puppy needs surgery and he’s having trouble making ends meet this month.  If you can donate $15 or more, you’ll get a physical copy of the full album release later this month.  Save the puppies, and then dance with them!

My head esplode!  The genius Doctor Octoroc has just released a teaser of his in progress Christmas album 8-bit Jesus, and it has blown my mind’s brain.  Not content to simply port over several holiday favorites to the 8-bit format, the good doctor has based each of these tunes on a particular game from that era with incredibly spectacular results.  Joy to the World as if it were included in Bionic Commando?  Fantastical.  A version of Carol of the Bells straight out of Castlevania?  Stunning.  The best part of the whole deal is that only half of the tracks have been released so far, with the rest due out around the coming of Old Saint Nick.  Please immediately head to Doc’s blog and give him some feedback and motivation to finish this amazing amazingness.

8-Bit Jesus: New Christmas Chip-tune Album

UPDATE:  Ughzzz…I totally forgots:  team this with the 8-bit Peoples’ The 8bits of Christmas and all of your Christmas dreams will come true and be awesome.


Garden Gnome Carnage for the PC

Okay, I take back everything I said about Santa Ride! and Santa Ride! 2 (but not what I said about Die Hard Trilogy). This time, I swear to God, Garden Gnome Carnage is the best Christmas-themed game I’ve ever played. Well, technically, I hadn’t ever played Garden Gnome Carnage before, so what I said about Santa Ride! was true, from a certain point of view. kentdog engages in hyperbole; it’s a first.

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Where to start about this fantastic little game? Let’s see if I can wreck your shit with some math:

Rad pixel graphics + Incredible 8-bit music + explosion / great micro-physics gameplay =


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The story is simple:

“Garden Gnomes don’t like holidays. You, a gnome of the big city, have had enough of those pesky elves climbing down your skyscraper to drop gifts down the chimney. You put remote-controlled wheels on the skyscraper and tie yourself to the chimney with a bungee cord. This holiday, the will elves fly.”

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Move your skyscraper back and forth, swinging the Gnome into the Lemming-esque elves that assault your tower with the gift of giving. Grab explosive bricks from your building and fling them into crowds of hapless elves. If things get too hot, call in an airstrike for mass destruction. Score multiple hits for combo bonus. Win bonus from me just by playing this game. Pass it around the office. It’s this years Elf Bowling, I swear.

Grab it here.



Sample the music here.

Digg it here.


Santa Ride! 2 for the PC

Santa Ride! 2 is probably the worst Christmas-themed game I’ve ever played, unless maybe you count Die Hard Trilogy, of which 2/3 does happen to take place on Christmas. Did you know that every time John McClane kills someone, an angel gets its wings? That reminds me that I’ll have to talk about Die Hard Trilogy later on. Santa Ride! is essentially a modification of developer Invictus’s Cross Racing Championship off-road racing game for the PC. There’s not much to it. Race Santa’s Sleigh, or “sledge” as it is called here, around a simple track, collecting presents for points and extra time, accompanied by festive music. A surprising amount of physics allow you to drift the Santa’s Sledge directly into the presents for extra bonus. However, for this sequel, they managed to totally dick up the physics to the point of it not being fun any more. Turning is just way too stiff, and that makes me flacid. For extra bonus from me, enjoy Santa Ride! 2 whilst watching the Dirty Harry parody Sledge Hammer!

I feel like Dropo, the laziest man on Mars…